Thursday, July 5, 2012

Quick Cuts: "Cop Out" Movie Review by Ben Foutch

Director: Kevin Smith
Writers: Robb Cullen, Mark Cullen
Actors: Bruce Willis, Tracy Morgan and Juan Carlos Hernández
Rated: R
Run Time: 107

You may or may not remember this forgettable turd that was dumped into cinemas in 2010 (probably better for your mental health if you don't), but believe me, it did happen and it does suck. Supporting a dependable cast of comedy veterans and helmed by a well-known director, Cop Out definitely lives up to its title and sets itself up for its inevitable fate of becoming another Hollywood film that fades into obscurity.

Jimmy and his partner Paul, both N.Y.P.D. detectives, get suspended after botching an important operation involving a drug dealer. Fearing that he will not be able to pay for his daughter's wedding, Jimmy decides to sell a rare baseball card. Things get even worse for the guy when the collectible memorabilia store gets robbed and his card is taken from him. Inane shenanigans propel Jimmy and Paul to each new situation and both end up happy at the end (sorry to give away the obvious outcome to this derivative pile of garbage).

Everything in this movie is completely phoned in. The jokes, which are fine in concept, do not have rythm or energy ('The Other Guys' got it right). It's as if all of these usually funny actors were forced at gunpoint to be as bored as they possibly could. Tracy Morgan is Tracy Morgan, so there isn't much to say in that regard, but everyone else involved is completely uninspired. You can't call it an action or drama, and it's not funny enough to be considered a comedy. Forget the sounds of nature, this is the new sleeping aid.

This review sounds completely scathing as I'm typing this (and it should be considering that it is the cinematic equivalent of sitting at the DMV), but the truth is that I don't have strong feelings for this film in any regards. It merely exists without purpose and devoid of any thought. It's sort like seeing trash that has been discarded in a public area and is about twenty feet in a different direction than your current destination. You want to pick it up and throw it away because its such an eye sore, but at the same time, you don't really care and just move on. Since I didn't come out and say this already, do not waste your time with this movie. Throwing a tennis ball against a wall or watching paint dry has more merit than sitting through this exercise in futility.